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The Brothers Bloom Review

The Brothers Bloom

The Brothers Bloom is witty, confusing mess of a movie, but it’s really fun to watch.

My rating 3.5 Stars

Stephen and Bloom were brothers and very talented con artists. Steven developed a con like Mozart wrote music.  They were also well known and respected by other con artists. It all started back when they were children. One day, Bloom had his eye on a certain young lady, but he was too shy to approach her. Stephen knew that Bloom would talk to her if he could focus his mind on something else other than the girl and so their first con was born. Stephen wrote an elaborate plan for them to make money from the school children and at the same time get his brother to talk to the young lady. The plan was brilliant. Bloom was to tell the kids about a cave with a magical creature inside. The children believed the story, but Bloom would not reveal the whereabouts of the cave unless they paid up and so they did. Every child coughed up 2 bucks and off they went to see the cave. When they got there, Steven was hidden in the cave holding a shiny object. The reflection was very bright and so the children of course thought that it was the magical creature. Steven then moved deeper into the cave and so the reflection of “creature” dimed and disappeared. The children went in the cave madly to try to catch the magical creature, but instead they all slipped on mud that Steven had previously set up so that the children would fall and get muddy. He didn’t do this to be mean; he had other reasons.

The children never found the creature, but nevertheless they were all thrilled and excited about the adventure. However, once the children got home all dirty, their parents were livid! Each parent went to the home of the brothers Bloom and demanded that they return their children’s money. The Bloom brothers were in trouble; they returned the money and were grounded for their behavior. However, as I said before, the plan was brilliant. Steven had struck a deal with the only dry cleaner in town the day before. He promised him a spike in business the next day if he were to get a cut of the profits. The next day all of the parents took in their children’s muddy garments to the dry cleaners to be washed. And so the Brothers Bloom pulled their first con and they never looked back. That is until Bloom realized that his life was a lie!

The Brothers Bloom eventually grew up and became increasingly skilled con men. They were very successful, but Bloom started to feel as if his entire life has been scripted by his brother; the money, the life, the women, all had been written like some kind of story by his brother Steven. As much as Bloom appreciated his efforts, he felt as if he should be creating his own life. He wanted out. Steven, of course, was disappointed, but he did let him go. Steven loved his brother very much. His whole life was spent making sure his brother was happy and well taken care of. When Bloom came to this decision Steven was worried that his bother would not be happy on his own. He decided to write one last con, one that would set Bloom for the rest of his life. The trick was that Bloom should never know the real intentions of the con.

Steven found a miserable shut-in, a young woman who was very rich. The truth, he wanted his brother to settle down with her, but Bloom would never just do that. Instead, he convinced his brother to do one last con and after that he would never bother him again. Bloom agreed and they proceeded to con the miserable shut-in. The target’s name was Penelope and she was hysterical. She was also very, very rich, so rich that when she drove her Lamborghini she didn’t bother using her brakes. Instead she would use standing structures to stop her car; she would just buy a new car and replace the structure right after destroying it. Her life consisted of collecting other people’s hobbies. When she saw someone doing something she liked, she would study it and perfect it. The woman could juggle chainsaws while riding an 18 foot tall unicycle.

The brothers studied her for a while and they realized the best way to enter her life was to fake an “accident.” Bloom would put himself in a position where Penelope would hit him with her car and she would feel terrible for him and fall for his charm later on. However, things didn’t go as planned this time around. She did fall for Bloom as planned, but she also finds out that the two were con artists and that she was being conned, but she didn’t care, she wanted to join the gang and con others. After being locked up in a huge mansion all of her life, she had never felt more alive than when she met the brothers Bloom.

The Brothers Bloom is the story of a con within a con within a con and so on and it’s pretty entertaining. The movie is a crazy confusing ride at times. You get lost quite a bit, but they always manage to get you back, but not quite on track. This film must’ve been a real challenge to keep straight because the plot is all over the place and you often wonder who’s conning whom. I found the movie to be a lot of fun, granted it’s not the best movie in 2009, but it is a pretty decent one. It’s one that I think people will enjoy. I know I did!

Categories: 2009 Movie Reviews
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